Monday, April 28, 2008

Putting my germ OCD on hold

Front Runner is free for a few days. So for our FHE activity, we rode UTA's newest addition. It's a double decker train that runs from SLC to Ogden with five or six stops along the way. Of course, everyone else in the Western Hemisphere thought it would be a fun activity and piled in with us.

Although the train is fast and very smooth, it was packed with humanity. Like rides at Lagoon, there was no tellin' why the handholds were so sticky. We were breathing other people's breath, touching other people's germs, invading each other's personal space. I don't even know these people! Where's my Purell? Clorox wipes? I'm having a petite maul! I couldn't wait to get home and detox.


To help me through the ordeal, I saw that our train was travelling as fast as an appliance repair van on the freeway running parallel to the tracks. The phone number for the van was clearly visible from my "standing room only" perch. I whipped out my cell and called the number. I watched as the van driver lifted his phone to see who was calling. When he answered and announced his name, I asked him if he was driving an appliance repair van. He said he was.

I began thinking (only thinking) about all the twisted fun I could have at his expense ("Well I'm in the little white Honda to your left and you just cut me off. Don't be such a jerk driver!" He looks to the left to see an old woman driving a little white Honda and who isn't on a cell phone and starts to wonder who he's really talking to since it clearly isn't her. "Don't look at me when I'm talking to you! I'm Madam Stella, the geriatric ventriloquist and that's why you don't see my lips moving! "It takes all my elderly resources just to keep this stupid car heading straight down the road, otherwise I'd be giving you the grandma eye right now!") He looks around to see who else might be able to observe him, totally unaware of me in the train, using him to pass the time while I cope with my germ aversion.

All of that dialogue passes through my shriveled little brain in a fraction of a second. Then I tell him I'm a passenger in the Front Runner train to his left and I'm wondering how fast we're going since I have no speedometer. He remarks that this is totally unexpected, to make a connection like this, and starts cracking up. Somehow this is really funny. (huh??? - not as funny as it could have been, appliance boy!) He eventually tells me we're pushing 78-79 mph. I thank him and hang up. Hmm, impressive. It feels more like 30 mph. We're about to reach the Farmington stop. This is where we'll catch the train going back to Salt Lake. And it was just pulling in - perfect timing!

But it's even more packed than the last one. I can see this isn't going to get any better unless we wait for several hours while the horde dies down. We can't wait so on we go, even closer to society than before. Families with little children, wives wrangling kids and silently cursing husbands who all thought this was a great idea. Husbands looking in wide-eyed wonder at this marvel of transportation engineering. They are unaware of the explosive wrath coiled to shatter the peace of their little world. "Isn't this a great idea? Whose having fun?" they ask their family.

...crickets chirping.

No one is having fun. Not mom, not kids, no one. Babies cry, diapers stink, everything stinks. Stale air, motion sickness, nausea, the perfect setting for a pukefest. I can see their wives smolder. Damage control will be huge!

I'm laughing inside because these men are so out of touch. But wait, wasn't this my thinking as well just hours ago? However, my circumstances are different. My own kids are coping well. They seem to be tolerating...maybe even enjoying their surroundings. And fortunately, my own sweetie felt it would be best to stay home and try to keep her sore throat from turning into a bigger one. She was spared the agony. We finally arrive in Salt Lake and gush onto the platform. It's over. There's Germ-X in the car, and at least we didn't have to pay!

I'm okay.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Preventative measures

Because some nutjob posted a link to a malicious website in a comment on Bradwich's blob, I've decided that I'll be moderating comments on my blob. This allows me to reject comments for any reason, like harmful links. The downside is that your comments won't show up until I accept them. Sorry about that. But I'll try not to let it go too many days before I get to it. And isn't it great that you can force the post date and time to whatever you like? It makes it look like I don't allow huge lapses of time between posts on my blob, when really, I do. I know I'm not fooling anyone here, for all y'all check my blob daily and my true blob-neglecting nature is easily revealed.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

It works!

I'm talking about the Corolla from the previous post. I got up early yesterday morning (well, early for a Saturday) and bolted more stuff to the engine.



Then I hoisted it up and wheeled it out to the car. Thanks to my sweetie for the pics.



My wife and youngest son came out and helped. These hoists are life savers! So is my family!



We positioned the hoist with the engine in front of the car.



We had to raise it high to clear the front. It took some adjusting, but we eventually got the mounting holes aligned.



We bolted it in place, then reattached everything. I was thankful that we had labeled all the connecting points, it made it easy to map it all back to the correct locations.

My sweetie was a trooper and was connecting parts to the engine and fitting belts and hoses in place. She's very handy! After many hours of work, we started it up. It cranked over for several seconds and then fired right up. Hooray!!!

We took it for a little test drive and no leaks, no warning lights on the dashboard, and it sounded great! Happy day! After all that, I was ready for a day of rest today. And sort of got that, too. Double prizes!

Friday, April 11, 2008

The little engine that couldn't...

...but soon will! These are pics of the engine from my son's car, A 2001 Toyota Corolla, and the place in the car that it came from and will soon return to.

The engine is temporarily residing in my garage, where it has had surgery and is now recovering. Last October-ish, my son and daughter (in-law) put a chunk-o-change into it to keep it going. It has had a troublesome CEL (check engine light) that keeps it from passing emissions. It also recently developed major internal engine problems - what's known as a rod knock. This is BAD. It means the engine will soon self-destruct.

An acquaintance thought he could buy a used engine and swap it out for $700-800 including labor and parts. He looked for months for a used engine but could never find one reasonably priced. The best we did was $1450 for just an engine. Labor to swap it out was extra. But you ask: "Why not just pay somebody to fix the worn parts that are causing the rod knock?" Because of the labor expense. This is a major repair requiring disassembling almost the entire engine. A typical shop rate is around $75 per hour and the dealer is around $95 per hour. This is a 23 hour job (for a professional - hundreds of hours for an novice like me). 23 hours x $75/hour = $1,725. When you add parts, it's around $2000. The cost is too prohibitive.

But I'm a maniacal, ...err, I mean mechanical kind of feller. I like to tinker with stuff: cars, computers, tools, man toys. A few years ago I picked up a wrecked road bike for free. I restored it and have had a great time riding it. Sometimes I tear into something only to learn that it is more involved than I thought it would be. I've rebuilt motorcycle engines, and did a car engine in high school shop class ages ago. But these days it's mostly just brakes or other minor repairs. However, I knew what I was getting into with this -- the Toyota would be very involved.

I pulled the engine out of the car, tore it apart, took the guts to a machine shop (a place with special tools and expertise that can re-shape the guts to like new condition), and started putting it back together. It's taken several weeks because of time constraints, but it is coming along. It might be finished by Saturday evening. If anyone is planning a similar event, here's my list of tips for rebuilding an engine:

  1. Plan on giving up some real estate and make sure it isn't a prime location. The car will just be sitting there until it's drivable again. BTW, the neighbors love seeing a car on jack stands with no front tires. (Hey buddy, whadya think this is, a trailer park or somethin'?)
  2. Give up more real estate where the engine will be torn down. Parts get spread out all over the place!
  3. Egg cartons make great holders for all the little parts (i.e. nuts, bolts, clips).
  4. Every toolbox needs a Sharpie. Label everything or you'll forget what goes where (nuts, bolts, clamps, hoses, wiring harnesses). This is the voice of experience talking!
  5. Have friends who have tools, establish a relationship of trust with them, and Bob's your uncle! I have seven awesome neighbors who have all kinds of tools. Many of those tools are in my garage right now. This job would have been impossible without them.
  6. Used but refurbished ten dollar coveralls from Pepboys. Some of the best money I've spent. I just put these on over my street clothes and I'm good to go. Takes 30 seconds and saves my clothes from grease and dirt. When it's dinner time, slip right out, no big deal. Plus, chicks dig it. (Well, my sweetie does. Actually, I made that up. I look like a dork.)
  7. Avon fingernail brush shaped like a Pink Pearl eraser. I've adopted this little brush from my wife, whose had it for years. It helps clean the dirt and grime from under my nails to keep my hick-ness under control.
  8. Fast Orange hand cleaner and Dawn dishwashing liquid. A 50/50 cocktail of these products cleans hands quite well, and the Fast Orange smells good.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Woo Hooo! Look at you - Birthday Girl!!


To my sweet Mom! Happy Birthday to you!! I'm so glad you were born and for how you've raised us kids! You and dad are awesome!

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Not enough...

time? Just stay up later. That's the mantra of my children and I've been adopting it recently as well. Where does this tie in? Hang with me.

This last weekend, my son and I spent some time working on a rental property in Midway, UT. This property belongs to my parents and needed some sprucing up. The list included: Laying tile, patching sheetrock cracks, touching-up paint, cleaning soot from the ceiling above the fireplace, installing new blinds, replacing some furniture and reupholstering other furniture.

My father and brother got up there early Friday and began the repairs. After working a half day at my normal job, I picked up my youngest son from school and up we went. This would be a multi-day project and he and I planned to stay overnight up there. When we got there, my Dad and brother had made great progress. My son volunteered to put together a TV stand. It was a multi-tiered affair with tons of parts. He did a great job and when finished it looked better than the picture on the box it came in.

Dad and brother left for the day around 7p. Son and I kept working on various projects and then got Subways for dinner. Afterward, I watched him play some Wii and checked my e-mail. The next morning we got going again. Dad and brother showed up about 9a and the place was rockin' with projects. We had conference going on while we were up there and it was neat to join in the Solemn Assembly.

My sweetie brought up the rest of the family and lunch for us and it was fantastic. Chicken salad on home made rolls, cinnamon rolls, and veggies. Then she and daughter reupholstered the dining room chairs. (Son did the first chair and they finished the other six.) They turned out beautifully. We got things wrapped up by about 530p and headed back, we missed about 30 minutes of priesthood session so I'll be catching up on that online.

There were a couple of little things left undone. The DVD player that dad bought didn't work (a cheap-o-la hunk of plastic from Big Loss [Lots]). And there was some furniture that we forgot to take up with us. Mom and dad got a different DVD player and some lamp tables. They also had a large mirror that they were no longer using in their home.

If you've hung with me 'til now, here's your payoff. After FHE on Monday, we decided to head back up there with the stuff from my mom and dad. We didn't have enough time, so we just stayed up later.

By this time, it was about 8p. We stopped at Home Depot for some supplies in case we needed to touch up the mirror frame. Once up there, we could tell that the mirror frame didn't match, so we masked and painted it. By the time we were done, the mirror and furniture looked pretty good, but it was a little past midnight - way late for a couple of old duffers (we'll, for me but not my sweetie, she's 29 and this was nothin').

We finally got to bed at 1a. Now, my kids do this all the time and don't appear to have any ill effects, but for me, whoa. Eyes - heavy. Mind - cloudy. Fingers - lazy. Blobbing - hard.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

My sweetheart...

...is so great! She created for me this nifty blog complete with my own nick name ("Nick" name? Nick? - get it? She's clever!) and everything. She's been suggesting for weeks now I should get with the program and have a blog. Right. I can't even keep up with the things I need to do, let alone want to do. (What? You mean they aren't the same thing?)

And now this, this, this BLOB. And the lists, they don't relent - music, books, talks, links, recipes, quotes, movies, surveys, videos. Where do people get all the time needed to keep everything up to date on these things?

So here she's gone and done it for me. She was so excited about it that when she called me to tell me what she'd done, she offered to take my dictation over the phone about what my first blog should say. (Thanks luv, but you have even less time than I do.) So these are my own words, typed by my own arthritic, tortoise-like fingers.

You may be aware from reading her blog that I was working on losing some weight along with my peers at work. Five pounds to be sure. Today was the final weigh in. I'd lost 6.2 lbs. This is good news because I get my money back ($50 that I put in the pot in January, returned if I make my goal, along with anyone else's money forfeited from their un-met goals). Several people forfeited money, so it will be divided among the rest of us.

I'm happy to be getting my own money back. The natural man in me is ecstatic to be getting someone else's money - twisted, I know.

As for blogging - be sure to check back infrequently just to verify that the same old junk is still here. And don't be too disappointed if you tag me for something and nothing happens. Yup, SITM (stick in the mud). As proof, please refer to my untouched, year-old Facebook page. I'm told I can also now comment on other people's blobs. If I only had a brain.

In fact, if something does happen, it'll probably be because of my sweetheart. She's already added photos and links and enlivened this plot of real estate in cyberspace. Thanks Luv!